Jumping to Conclusions- a true story of a coward

I am normally a rational person who debates all sides of something and who takes FOREVER to make a decision.

So what makes me jump to conclusions? FEAR.

I was in this basement last week checking on the equipment. Now basements are generally freaky places when they aren't finished, and this is one of them where the walls are kinda crumbly and shadows loom everywhere. So I did my thing and as I left, I noticed in the corner this greyish-brown round object that looked like an egg.

I ran.

I made this foolish crazy dash up the steps and slammed the door. Okay, now it sounds cowardish, but it is what it is. I ran because of an egg. But my first thoughts were, what the heck kinda monster lays eggs that round, that big and lives down here!? I was envisioning something alligator-snake-chicken-ish. I just didn't want to see it.

So after calmed, I Googled it. Eggs, round, brown, grey... got a nice list of potential suspects but none of them were really ROUND. So I sneaked back down the steps. Oh it was round all right. ROUND. I compared them again and settled on a very impossible hybrid bird-snake. Yup. I had a bird-snake in the basement. Possibly demonic because let's face it, nothing good would live in a dirty old basement.

I debated it for a moment and then realized the longer I debated it, the more chances that thing had of hatching. Oh. My. Gosh. I did not need two bird-snakes down there. So I found a box and a hammer. The plan was to roll it gently in the box and toss it outside. The hammer set my mind at ease in case at any time that simple plan went south. No idea what I was going to do with it, but I wasn't going down there again without it.

So I bravely rolled it into the box using the tip of the hammer (not my hands, that would be stupid). It was surprisingly light (or maybe I was foolishly strong?). From my experience, eggs are heavier than what this was. Regardless, I had it in the box. I shut it quickly and looked around for any other eggs. None.

So I ran up the stairs and straight outside. It was -36C out, but I didn't even stop for my jacket. I tossed it in the snowbank. It bounced off the hard snow like a ping pong ball. What the heck? So I leaned over it, much braver now that we were in sunlight and it was probably frozen.

It was a ball.

One of those hard ping-pong type balls infants roll around. Somehow it must have rolled down the steps and faded. No idea why I never noticed it until this week.

Still, I just freaked out over a ball a baby plays with. Sad thing was that not once did my brain rationally say, "Tanya, it's probably just a ball." Not once.

Ever jump to conclusions and live to tell about it? Your imagination ever get the best of you?

7 comments:

Elizabeth Varadan, Author said...

That was just too funny. Thanks for giving me my chuckle for the day. Probably for the week!

vbtremper said...

Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Can't stop laughing! But yes, I've been that scared of nothing and probably led to someone else not being able to stop laughing. Hee hee.

-Vicki

Richard Hughes said...

Actually, it sounds like you were brave. If it had been an alligator-snake-chicken-ish thing, you would have saved the world.

Tanya Lynne Reimer said...

Glad you ladies saw the humour in it! LOL. I am laughing now.

Thanks Richard, that's a great way to look at it. A hero is born in moments of terror. Genius.

Nas said...

Thanks for sharing this!

Suzi said...

That's awesome. Bet next time you won't be so afraid. :)

Tanya Lynne Reimer said...

Feeling braver already